Could it be that simple?

Just breathe My Name.
It is like the pressure of a child's hand that calls forth answering pressure, strengthens the child's confidence and banishes fear.
~God Calling / Author Unknown

With child like simplicity...it really is that simple. Breathe His name - feel His response and watch the miracles rain down. It's amazing how the simple act of speaking a name can bring such comfort, peace, safety, tranquility, revelation and contentment. That's the power of our Lord - that just His Name would carry so much weight. If only I could maintain my full understanding of that power at all times...I can't help but think of the danger this would pose to satan and it is no wonder that he stops at nothing to prevent it. To walk in the full authority of the name of Jesus - to command the power that He desires us to have in the precious name of Jesus. Christians could become absolutely terrifying people to the enemy if we could capture, understand and then exercise that Godly authority! To cast out demons wherever we went, to heal the sick everywhere...imagine the possibilities! I know Satan is shuttering at the thought.

It seems almost too simple - that it would only rely in the power of one name, but it is a name above all else and it is a testimony to the true authority of Christ.

I encourage anyone interested in this stuff to check out Patricia King - I saw her speak last night at a conference and was truly touched and amazed at our lack of understanding and knowledge when it comes to this aspect of our faith. It is all over the bible and yet we still pose the question, 'is it real'? We don't dare doubt the salvation that is preached and presented in the bible and yet we question the other ideas that are posed - why? Because we don't understand them? Because they are outside the box that we have built in our lives? I know that I have been tempted to step outside that box and I am praying that the Lord will respond in mighty ways. I want a piece of that God, I want a piece of You...

Joyful Obedience...

As if the word obedience wasn't a hard enough pill to swallow at times...adding the word 'joyful' to it can at times be like the straw that broke the camels back. Today the Lord posed this challenge to me...

'How dare you declare obedience to me and proclaim to exercise this obedience to my will and yet do so begrudgingly. Is My will not your own? Do you not desire what I desire? '

Touche Lord! It is not just a call to obedience, but the joyful obedience that comes with trusting that His ways are above my own and are better than my own. The true acknowledgment that I willingly and gladly lay down my self and what I think is best and gratefully receive Your divine direction and guidance in my life. As the cheerful giver is so greatly blessed to be giving out of joy and gladness, so is the one who practices obedience out of joy and trust in God.

Tonight I confess my resistance to what I believe to be the Lords command for me right now. I confess the self pity that has accompanied the death of my own desires and plans. I seek a heavenly perspective, fresh eyes to see as You see Lord - let me have a renewed sense of Your will in my life. I want to proclaim with boldness that I am choosing your path and that I do so with a happy heart. THANK YOU Lord, for Your answered prayers and for Your revelations in my life...I receive all of these things and pray that I can walk in them daily! You are so faithful!! Keep me humble Lord, in Your presence I seek to be humbled and kept in my rightful place. For all of the blessings you continue to pour into my life I praise you and stand in awe of Your amazing grace and mercy...thank you Lord.

Questions from God...

Over the course of the past week I have spent a lot of time in deep prayer and meditation about decisions in my life that needed to be made - while seeking answers to those questions, as the Lord has a way of doing, He brought forth other aspects of my life that in a round about way were directly related and which answered all of my questions with one big question from the Him(funny how He still does that - answers our questions with questions of His own).

'What are you seeking'? Funny - seems like a fairly broad question...and yet it is so specific. What am I seeking - what is the goal - what is the final destination? I have realized this week that in the Christian life, there are pretty much 2 options...we can accept Christ and do our best to live a good life, accepting His grace and mercy and trying our hardest to stay out of trouble while serving our fellow brothers and sisters however we feel we are equipped to do so or we can dig in, devote our entire beings and follow hard after God with strict determination and conviction to be more holy, more Christ like with every passing day regardless of the consequences. While there is nothing necessarily wrong with the former (it by no means makes that Christian any less loved or saved by Christ's sacrifice) the latter, I believe, leads to a life as God intended it to be, full of intimacy and experiences only available to those who are truly willing to seek Him with a reckless abandon of their own selves. The question posed to me this week was, in a nutshell, which do I desire for myself?

"I don't want to suggest that becoming like Christ will be easy. Seeking intimacy with the Almighty requires focused determination, demands specific changes in attitude and behavior, and will come with a number of heartbreak and setbacks."
~~So You Want To Be Like Christ - Charles Swindol~~

Focus? Determination? Heartbreak? Yes - that's it. Becoming more like Christ and receiving the blessings that come with that requires a person to set out with the specific purpose of doing so and then the determination to persevere through the pain and trials that are going to come with the journey. Being holy and more Christ like does not just fall into our laps...it is not something that certain people are blessed with or something that just 'happens' after you've put in enough time. It is a desire of the heart, it is sought after and it is earned. The first step is to decide 'what are you seeking'? If the desire is to be more like Christ, then the commitment to train spiritually must follow. With that training comes the sacrifice of all that is in our flesh. It is not a/b me, nor my desires. It is not a/b the desires of those around me, what makes them happy or content - it is not about what I think is right - it is only about Him and what He deems as right and holy. What a HUGE concept! To take every thought, every desire and to present it to God Himself, in all of His glory, and ask Father, is this Your desire??

I have decided this week that my desire is to place God before everything else in my life. To be in accordance to His will for me - to be sensitive to what He wants in my life and to lay down my fleshly wants and needs in order to walk according to His. A commitment? Sure. A sacrifice? Definitely. But both necessary if the goal is being holy and godly and more like Christ. This week I have found that it is my desire to seek purposefully, intently and whole heartedly after God. I am no longer able to rest in my salvation, I want more - more of whatever it is that He has to offer, whatever it is that He has to give me...I want it. And in that realization I received my answers to the questions I originally sought prayer for - again, funny how He manages to do that.

So, in conclusion, I ask you the same question the Lord has asked me...what exactly are you seeking? And what are you willing to do to get there?

What God has joined together...

Over the course of the weeks since Julie and Ryan were married there have been such great testimonies brought forward as to how their wedding has touched people at their very core. It is such an amazing thing to see how the Lord is showing his power and is visibly answering the prayers of so many through this event. There were so many praying diligently that the Lord's presence would be felt at this ceremony and that their wedding and marriage would be a living testimony for God. I was thrilled to see so many people partaking in prayer and in service to Him during this time, people who are not accustomed to it and people who were likely made to feel a little uncomfortable by it...discomfort in the Lord is almost always a good sign! I can remember a good friend saying to me once - pick just a/b any venue, stand in the middle of a crowded room and simply say the name Jesus and it will undoubtedly bring about utter silence. It is a name that causes question and at times discomfort, it is a name that offends and a name that brings conviction - praise God for it! Praise God for the working of His spirit in a place filled with so many unbelievers...people who would not be subject to goodness of His message in any other way.

I was so blessed by the wedding and I have continued to be blessed by the stories and testimonies that are coming forth. All glory and honor and praise to the One who is so giving and who is so faithful in His promises...I pray blessings upon their marriage, that Julie and Ryan would continue to seek His face and continue to seek service to Him in the ways they are called to do so. I pray protection against any attacks brought upon them for their service and that their marriage would be guided and guarded by the living and loving Father.

Man is so made that he can carry the weight of twenty-four hours - no more. Directly he weights down with the years behind, and the days ahead, his back breaks. I have promised to help you with the burden of today only, the past I have taken from you and if you, foolish hearts, choose to gather again that burden and bear it, then, indeed you mock Me to expect Me to share it. For weal or woe each day is ended. What remains to be lived, the coming twenty-four hours, you must face as you wake.
~God Calling / Author Unknown
This passage could not have been received at a better time...the past few days have been, for the most part, lived moment to moment - it is the only way that I have found to climb the mountains in my life. Anything beyond this moment is too overwhelming to think about and will usually lead me into doubt, fear and ultimately failing. Thoughts of the past and the pain that can accompany those thoughts will usually bring forth old emotions and feelings that are better laid to rest and which have already been covered by the blood of our saviour. Thoughts of the future, can bring forth fear and confusion, anxiety and stress...all of which are also already covered in the blood of our saviour. Trying to live in the day, is so difficult, and yet there is so much freedom in receiving the strength the Lord has given you today and using it for today only and not trying to stretch it to cover the days to come. Have faith that He will provide for you today and that He will provide new strength and wisdom for tomorrow as well! We serve a faithful and holy God - one of fulfilled promises throughout the ages and One who has all creation under His control. How humbling to maintain the perspective that He is the almighty creator, controller of the heavens and earth and that we have no worry too great and no burden too heavy. His yolk is easy and His buren light - relieve yourself of the burdens of the past and the future that serve only to hold you back and weigh you down - serve Him today and He will provide blessings to cover this day and all those that follow...

He will sustain you...

Life can never be the same again. Once you have drunk of the wine of My giving, the Life Eternal - all earth's attempts to quench your thirst will fail.
God Calling - Author unknown

Being ruined for the Lord...it's like tasting the finest wine or coffee ever created...you will forever be ruined to the taste of anything less. While it can be frustrating and sometimes painful, it is a wonderful thing to know that you have been 'ruined' by God - to know that you have experienced something that will never let you forget and that will always haunt you in your attempts to deny it. It is my comfort today - knowing that the conviction over my recent fallings is only because I have experienced a heightened sense of Gods glory and blessings. I am grateful for this time b/c it is my affirmation that what I have experienced over the course of the past year has been a true transformation from my former self and that I need not fear.

Self dethroned - that is the lesson, but in its place put Love for Me, knowledge of Me. ~God Calling

Over the course of the past year I have been somewhat unknowingly on a journey to truly dethrone myself - I have gradually replaced my own perceptions and beliefs with thoughts of the Lord and with knowledge of Him. This time, this short season of time, I am learning just how much so. Tonight during a time of meditation and prayer I had the thought and vision of the Lord, so large - standing on the world. All of his children scurrying around at His feet, in such a futile hustle. There He stood - simply gazing down upon us and then gazing down upon me. On me, among all else, He saw me. Then He grew even larger and the world was encompassed in his hands...and then I felt rest. I am in His hands, we all are, being held so carefully. It is a peace and rest that I needed to be reminded of. Amidst the chaos and the every day rat race, that peace and rest is always there - it is a matter of retreating into a place where we can feel it and acknowledge it.

Thank you to those of you who have responded in prayer and phone calls to my recent posts. Please know that I love each of you so much and that my spirit is well - it is just a short time of trial and testing. I love you all so much for being so encouraging and for being such lights to me. You are all a part of my testimony and know that each of you is serving the Lords kingdom by continuing to guide me and encourage me to live it out. I am so thankful for the blessings the Lord has given me - rest assure that the enemy has not been victorious! He has only succeeded in driving me closer to God and in pushing me further in my pursuit of absolute surrender. Praise the Lord! I pray blessings upon all of you, for joy and peace and love, may the Lord be upon you today and always!!

Obedience...

John 14:15
"If you love me, you will obey what I command.

Jeremiah 7:23
but I gave them this command: Obey me, and I will be your God and you will be my people. Walk in all the ways I command you, that it may go well with you

Joel 2:11
The LORD thunders at the head of his army; his forces are beyond number, and mighty are those who obey his command. The day of the LORD is great; it is dreadful. Who can endure it?

Luke 11:28
He replied, "Blessed rather are those who hear the word of God and obey it."

1 John 2:5
But if anyone obeys his word, God's love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him:

2 John 1:6
And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.

Deuteronomy 28:1
If you fully obey the LORD your God and carefully follow all his commands I give you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations on earth.

John 14:24
He who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me.

Leviticus 18:4-5
You must obey my laws and be careful to follow my decrees. I am the LORD your God. Keep my decrees and laws, for the man who obeys them will live by them. I am the LORD

Deuteronomy 13:18
It is the LORD your God you must follow, and him you must revere. Keep his commands and obey him; serve him and hold fast to him

John 15:10
If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love.

Proverbs 19:16
He who obeys instructions guards his life, but he who is contemptuous of his ways will die

1 John 5:3
This is love for God: to obey his commands. And his commands are not burdensome

The evidence is staggering...the stock God puts in obedience can be frightening when it's something that you're struggling with. It has been a message that has been thrown at me from every direction over the course of the past 2 weeks. I am not so naive to believe that this is coincidence. It is frustrating b/c in theory it shouldn't be so difficult - the knowledge of our salvation and the joy the accompanies that should be enough to drive obedience from anyone, and yet it is something that many battle - the obedience to the spirit rather than the flesh. Obedience...such a simple word, and yet, such a great action, with many great benefits. For anyone seeking intimacy, a connection with God, an encounter...pick something you struggle with - practice obedience in that specific area and I promise you...you will see God moving. He will fall over you like a mighty rain and you will be touched by a glory and grace you have not known before. He is always pleased by our choice to serve Him over ourselves...

May today be a day of service to the Lord, a day full of obedience and renewed reverence of the Mighty God who has created the very life we live. May today be a day of reflection on what we were created to be and who we were created to serve...may today be lived as it was meant to be...as the day the Lord made for us, so carefully and thoughtfully designed with every moment carefully planned in love for each of us individually. May we all live today thankfully and joyfully in the name of the Lord.

'Then I acknowledged my sin to you...'

Psalm 32
1 Blessed is he
whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.

2 Blessed is the man
whose sin the LORD does not count against him
and in whose spirit is no deceit.

3 When I kept silent,
my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.

4 For day and night
your hand was heavy upon me;
my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer.

5 Then I acknowledged my sin to you
and did not cover up my iniquity.
I said, "I will confess
my transgressions to the LORD "
and you forgave the guilt of my sin.

For those of you reading this - prayer is something that I could definitely use right now. The past 2 weeks have been very difficult weeks in more ways than just planning a wedding and watching a couple of dogs...one of the most terrifying words in my language these days is the word 'relapse'. Since experiencing my freedom from the strongholds in my life, it is the word that has the ability to bring bitter fear to my mind, but which is usually silenced quickly by a small prayer and belief that I am protected and in no danger of any such thing. The past 2 weeks have been a/b as close to a full blown relapse as I could possibly be...
Call it stress induced, anxiety driven, call it what you will, regardless - none of it is of the Lord and therefore none of it is good.
With is has come guilt, conviction, fear, anger and anguish - feelings I haven't experienced in quite some time and which I do not miss in the least.
I have struggled with some old feelings that haven't been present in a while, and as it usually happens...when something from your past comes back in an attempt to re-enter your life, it comes back with fierceness and bite. I confess this tonight, first in writing and later verbally to those I trust to receive it with compassion and in love, simply to humble myself before my Lord, who knows the sins I've committed and is only waiting for me to bring them to His feet, w/o my pride, so that He can once again cover them and display His never ending and all encompassing grace and mercy. I have found comfort in the differences I have seen in myself during this time...differences from before - the desire and ability to humble myself now rather than waiting in hopes that I could handle it on my own. I know now that I cannot, it is not of me, it is not of anyone else - it is something that only the Lord can fix and heal. Obedience is the key to intimacy...it has been a resounding theme during this time, one that is not by chance. Obedience is never fun in the beginning...but the intimacy and joy gained is always well worth the struggle.



Lord, I lay before You tonight in complete submission and thanks giving. You are so Holy and good, so perfect and righteous and I thank You for the sacrifice of Your Son, that I may come before you with my feeble requests. Thank you for creating my life, and for the many blessings you have bestowed upon me. I seek Your forgiveness for my iniquities and for my sins against You. Please cover me in Your grace and show mercy to your child once again for my inability to empty myself of the things that grieve You. Lord I seek to serve you completely - to be a true vessel for Your works. I am earnestly seeking renewed strength and sensitivity in my heart. Strengthen my conviction and reveal all things in me that are not of You.
Create in me a clean and pure heart, one that serves only You Lord. Thank You for hearing me, and for Your answers to my prayers Lord...I receive whatever You have to offer and pray that my praise and desire to be near is pleasing to You.
All of this I pray in your Sons precious and Holy name, Amen.

Perspective...

Yes, I know, it's been more than a few days since I've visited - but a little grace would be so very appreciated...it's been a busy week to say the least.
A few updates and then onto the deeper meaning behind the post. Julie got married last Saturday - wow, right? It seemed very unreal the whole time...one of those things in your life that you assume will always happen, you just can't believe it when it does. I'm so happy for her, the wedding went beautifully and they just got back from the honeymoon tonight - I had the pleasure of house sitting all week -- good times with me and the crazy dogs ;) And tonight I'm back home and trying to collect myself and my thoughts. I've had a lot going through my mind lately and tonight something kinda weird came to me - this may end up being short for a few reasons...either it's not as profound as it sounds in my head and when I start typing it I'll just feel like an idiot...or...it's even more profound than I think and I'll never be able to find the words to convey what it is that's jumbled up in my head...either way, I figure it's worth a shot.

I randomly started thinking about the human mind today. The psychology behind it all, the reasoning (if any) around it all and I think that it's fairly reasonable to say that every single person in this existence has their own sort of truth in their life. They live by their own perception of the world, their own views on the stimulus surrounding them, their own beliefs and all of these things make up their own individual 'reality' per se. Similar to two people who look at a painting and see two totally different works of art...so is it also with life. I cannot perceive your reality any more than you can perceive mine. People most often clash and find conflict when their perception and understanding of a situation is different - it creates 2 totally different 'realities' in which both feel completely justified...(try to hang w/ me here for a second). It is overwhelming to think a/b all of the different realities that are currently co-existing all around us. Every person caught in the midst of the world they have created in their very own mind...acting and reacting according to their own set of perceptions about what is going on to them and around them. All of this said to finally say that I find complete amazement in the idea that so many people with so many different truths - can actually find the same truth in Jesus Christ...with all of the different perceptions of the world, all of the different views and realities, in a simplistic way we can all find the same reality in Christ. If each of us sought to find our personal reality and truth in nothing more than the teaching of Christ, we would all for a moment be in the midst of the same perception, the same views...the same 'world'. Granted, over time we have even managed to create different truths about God, but as I said...in the simplest form - the truth of our savior is the same. It makes me think of heaven, with all of Gods children fixated on center of existence, perceiving it and understanding it in exactly the same way...what does that even look like? What a glorious time it will be...completely beyond my human comprehension.

I've been feeling a sort of conviction lately to really try to understand and hear people. Not from my perspective, but maybe from theirs. It's really difficult at times...different people with different life experiences creates the possibility that it could be literally impossible for me to truly understand their view on things...but the challenge is at the very least intriguing and one which I hope will create in me the ability to love all, even when I can't understand their personal reality. A little weird I know...but interesting none the less.

I found this song shortly after posting this - thank you Lord - it is exactly what I'm talking about here...

It feels like your life's crashing down all around you
Let me ask if it's really so bad
Look at the world in it's suffering
Can you honestly tell me that know one else could understand
All the hurting inside

Why can't you see that freedom is sometimes simply another perspective away
Who could you be if your lens was changed for a moment,
Would you still be the same

A young child looks through a great stained glass window
Watching the people go by
Everyone seems to be wearing a red coat
His mother sees jackets in white
Now he can't understand why does she see it this way

Yesterday, you really couldn't see
By changing your angle a new world would be
Revealed to your once blinded eyes by moving a few degrees

Why can't you see that freedom is sometimes simply another perspective away
Who could you be if your lens was changed for a moment,
Would you still be the same
~ Kutless ~

Weekly reflection...

It's been quite the past few weeks - life in general moving by at breakneck speed, waking up from day to day not really knowing what I did the day prior. It's been an entire month of very deep and very deliberate introspection. The very difficult task of looking in and seeking what is really there...digging into the areas that may not be so attractive and really looking at what makes up my 'being'. There's some good there and there's a whole lotta bad too. It's an exciting time and I'm so blessed with the perspective of knowing that I am in the midst of the Lords work - I am dab smack in the middle of refining - and as uncomfortable as that can be, there is so much to look forward to. I am well aware that this has nothing to do with me, but only with what the Lord is preparing in me and what He is preparing me to do. I can only try to make myself open and available for what He's doing...

I've been tested in so many areas lately - during this time I've learned that for the most part, what I have to say is much less important that what I should be hearing from the other person. My hurts, my sorrows, my pains - they are all seen by the One who matters, so why is it so important to make it known to others. Others who only want to voice their own hurt and pain and who want to be heard. Listening to theirs w/o voicing my own - that is the key. And it's not a/b keeping it in, or bottling it up - but about taking it to the One who can truly make it okay and who can truly understand. At times, my response to a situation can be a far greater testimony than any words that I feel I have to offer.


Remember, you are only an instrucment. Not yours to decide how or when or where you act. I plan all that. Make yoursel very fit to do My work. All that hinders your activity must be cured.

But, My children, you may think I did say, "Take up your cross daily and follow Me." Yes, but the cross given to each one of you is only a cross provided on which you can crucify the self of yours that hinders the progress and Joy and prevents the flow through your being of My invigorating Life and Spirit.
~God Calling (Author Unkown)

YES Lord! That is what I'm seeking - to not make one move or action that is not of You...to weigh everything I do against what You would do. I'm learning that my own actions and my own thoughts are typically very unfruitful but that if I follow the example set by Your Son - eventually it all works out for my own good.

At this moment Lord I am praying a prayer that I cannot always bring myself to pray...that I would be fully humbled and dead to myself - not caring about what is happening to or against me but resting in the full knowledge that You do and that all of it is being handled in Your time and in accordance to Your will. And that in this I would find the ability to crucify all that is interfering with the plans You have made for me.

My children, I am here beside you. Draw near in spirit to Me. Shut out the distractions of the world. I am your Life, the very breath of your soul. Learn what it is to shut yourself in the secret place of your being, which is My secret place too.
~God Calling / Author Unknown.